Wednesday, November 11, 2009

The line of control.

I'm talking myself into peace again. My power of control ends with the last layer of skin attached to my body. I cannot control things beyond me. I cannot control other people. I can only control myself, the things that I do, the way that I think, the things that I say, the things I don't say, the way I let things affect me, the way I act out how things affect me.. but it ends there. Saying that, I picture this really tall cliff island where I can run around crazy & do whatever I want but beyond that edge is a bottomless black void that I'll fall off of & just keep falling. Because there's nothing beyond the cliffs edge. Absolutely nothing. So I need to realize what I DO have, which is myself. I only have me. I am the only thing that is consistent & the only thing that matters, the only thing I can change. I know, contradiction--I am consistent & I am the change. But I'm the only thing I have an effective say in. Having said that, I need to indulge, dive in, & completely consume myself in what I do have. Right now, it's my school. My projects aren't going to care that I had a bad night & I've cried my eyes out. Therefor, anything that isn't my project, isn't in my hands waiting to be finished doesn't matter. My world does no t extend beyond what's directly in front of me. This is all that I have. If this doesn't get done I have absolutely nothing to show for myself. You cannot control people, stop trying to make them change. Accept them for who they are & move on. Whatever "moving on" best means for you at the moment. YOU CANNOT CHANGE PEOPLE. ACCEPT THEM FOR WHO THEY ARE. ACCEPT THEM FOR WHO THEY ARE & YOU WILL BE HAPPY.

Your line of control ends with you & you need to realize that & make what you can control matter.

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